used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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