Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
