Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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