The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
