Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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