Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Omg I joined a choir last night...
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
