Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The feeling are messing with the penis
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
