do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
