is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
