Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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