Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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