You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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