in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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