creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
