was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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