I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I could fuck to npr.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
