Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
How's work?
Spinning.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
