found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize