Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
