I wanna passion pit in your ass
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
