have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
