I can text with my tongue
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
