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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape

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• (707): View more from California

  Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.

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• (818): View more from California

  ...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (720): View more from Colorado

  and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (589): View more from

  seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....

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• (713): View more from Texas

  AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Are you ok?!

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.

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