dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
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