He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Hippo gnu deer
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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