ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize