if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
