For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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