he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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