What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Randomize
