Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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