he shaved USA in his pubs
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
