just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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