Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize