Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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