just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize