Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
