i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Blow job season was short but glorious.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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