Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
