Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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