we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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