I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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