I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize