I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
