Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
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hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
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Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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