just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
