i need an iv and a liver transplant
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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