i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize