Buhtt sex?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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