So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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