let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
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